» Britney Spears: Calm, Cool, Collected, Classy

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Britney Spears: Calm, Cool, Collected, Classy

Britney Spears got into a shouting match with the mother of one of her teenage fans. Wait, she still has fans?

Sucking on a cigarette, swilling a cuppa coffee, chomping gum and giggling like a loon, multitasking Skary Skank Britney Spears exited swanky Kitson on Robertson Blvd. – and suddenly got the grin seared off her kisser when a teenage fan’s fire-breathing momma blasted Ms. Toxic, labeling her a grungy, low-life role model…AND a lousy mother! Trouble began when Teen Girl spotted Pop Tart and rushed over, squealing with delight – but as My Spywitness gaped and gasped, Momma Hen elbowed her chick aside and spear-ed Britney with: “EXCUSE ME…but I hope you get your life together, work things out with your mother – then start taking care of your children! Family is the most important thing in the world!”

Grimacing through this tirade, Britney snarkily smacked gum and blew bubbles – popping them loudly. The mom – uncowed by Britney’s rage-a-holic rep – went right in her face and scolded: “You have absolutely NO manners! You have dirty habits, and you’re a terrible example for young girls – not to mention your fans…if you still have any!” The mortified (yet obviously still star-struck) daughter recoiled as Brit suddenly spit out her pink gum-wad and screamed at the mother: “LADY…MIND YOUR OWN F—–G BUSINESS!” …then stormed off down the street.

Honestly, if this is true - and it’s from the National Enquirer, so the likelihood of truth is somewhere between 0 and -4% - I don’t totally fault Britney. If some stranger on the street told me that I had dirty habits and no manners, I’d probably go off on them too. And then I’d call up my friends and family and ask them why they keep telling people about my habits and my lack of manners. Because, really, just because a girl likes to push children down and then run away, that shouldn’t be anyone’s business but mine. And maybe that of those deliciously pushable kids. But that’s it!

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Britney Spears: Calm, Cool, Collected, Classy